If I were someone who is so in love with myself and with my office because I feel so great and I have so much power; If I were somebody who cannot even bear the thought of being counted among the ordinary people subject to accusations for my perceived so many civil and so big criminal liabilities; If I were anybody else who avidly have the desire and the pursuant design to be somehow the same and to keep most of what I could; then, there are at least three possible and even actionable alternatives I have – in the event that I could neither prolong my position not stay as I am, no matter the way, irrespective of the means.
First, I shall back – front and side anyone that people would probably choose to take my place, or would allow some magic here and there, a dagdag there and bawas here, in order to replace me. It is certainly not a secret that I am rather good in such “hocus-pocus.” What is important is that once this nobody becomes somebody because of me, then the same in turn would not only protect me but also fear me because I can readily undo the poor creature.
Or second, I shall then aim for another office though with lesser power and lower stature. Of course, it would not be the same, especially in terms of the command with authority nor the influence over people. But at least, I could still be up and about, and pretend to be happy and contented, though feeling rotten and blue. There is really nothing like numero uno, after all.
Or third, I shall go far away that people I leave behind can no longer get me, nor the people I go to, shall give me to them. This is not that as bad as it appears. I would still keep whatever I could bring along as I like, to have all the comfort and luxury I deserve. Or certain characters can visit me then. We shall exchange stories and recall the very happy and joyful years we once all had by beneficial interactions such as I scratched their backs and they scratched mine.
I am certain there must be other ways for me to “Stay afloat!” – as they say. I shall continue asking my close – very close – advisers what are the open avenues for me on three conditions: One, that I shall be as I am now as much as possible; Two, that sky is the limit for me so that I could be where, when and how I want to be; and three, I shall look forward to be back where I am now at the cost of anything, at the expense of anyone.
Meantime, I shall use everybody I could and get everything I need since I have always deserve more than I now have. In all humility and truth, there is none other like me in mental and physical attributes, in actualities and potentials. In more ways than one, I am irreplaceable. I am looking ahead in writing my memoirs the way I see and know myself. Let all the generations yet come be much aware that there was once me!
August 25, 2008